Leprechauns

Jaydn's soccer team, the "leprechauns," played its first game today. A winner: 3-0. Jaydn is just getting better every year he plays.

Go Jaydn!

Happy Birthday Dad

Last week we celebrated my dad's ??th birthday. We went to dinner and had some birthday cake and presents. And played the traditional "put the shell on the shiny head and see if it falls off" game.

Camping and a Non-Operational Subway

We went camping at Heise Hot Springs last night. Our adventure began when we stopped on the way for dinner at the Ririe Subway.

We were happy that there was a "drive thru," so we pulled around the right side of the building. But there was no sign for ordering. So we pulled around the back. Again, no sign. So, we pulled around the other side of the building. Finally, we saw a drive thru window. Then, the following conversation insued:

Girl at the window: (opens window)

Me: I didn't see a sign where I could order.

Girl at the window: You need to go around the building.

Me: There's not a sign over there.

Girl at the window: Uh, we're not fully operational yet.

Me: Well, do you have a menu I can look at?

Girl at the window: No.

Me: Then I guess I'm not sure how to order.

Girl at the window: Haven't you ever been to Subway before?

Me: Yes, of course, but I haven't memorized the menu yet.

Jessi: Sean, just order something.

Me: I will, but I don't know what to order.

Girl at the window: Here--there's sort of a menu on this napkin (stating calories of several menu items).

Me: (thinking, "I'll order a Big Mac then") I guess I'll have the Sweet Onion Teriyaki Chicken sandwich then (only fancy looking sandwich on the napkin).

Girl at the window: What kind of bread?

Me: I don't know, where are the bread choices?

Girl at the window: (rolls shut the window to disclose sticker showing bread choices)

Me: (pointing to the Italian Herb bread)

Us: (Ordering three footlong sandwiches)

Girl at the window: (10 minutes later) That will be $5.14.

Me: Really? (thinking I should take the offer) We ordered three footlong sandwiches.

Girl at the window: (walking somewhere in the kitchen and returning) Uh, I mean, $15.14. (by this time, everyone in the car is cracking up)

Wow. Remind me never to go to a not-yet-fully-operational Subway again. Good ol' Ririe! I need to brush up on my Subway menu memorization skills.

Heise was fun, and the Snake River was beautiful. We went swimming in the hot springs pool on Friday night. We forgot to bring "fire," so we had to borrow someone else's fire to roast our marshmallows after swimming.

Jessi and I slept in the tent, and Jaydn and Launa (my mother-in-law) slept in the car. It was freezing. And for some ridiculous reason, the owners kept the ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-pizzzzzzz, ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-pizzzzzzz sprinkler on all night next to our tent. Jessi said it was because they wanted to water the grass. Ha ha.

Somehow, in the morning we ended up with all four sleeping on the twin air mattress. That means "get up." I was good to take our traditional "morning monster" camping picture.

Beautiful!

Spam

Spam e-mail tells me: "John McCain Picks Paris Hilton As Running Mate."

Why do I even bother cleaning out my spam box?

School starts today!

Jaydn went back to school today at a new school--again. He was so excited! As "back to school" news goes, check out the goal for American Samoa schools for the new school year -- having a teacher in every classroom. Hey, at least it's a start!

Important news from Russia - LDS Missionaries are CIA Agents

OK, we've heard this all before. I got it all the time on my mission. But this Russian professor proves it--Mormon missionaries are SPIES!

See it here in the Interfax online paper:

21 August 2008, 16:07

CIA agents in Mormon disguise are probable to work in Russia, a renowned sect expert believes

Moscow, August 21, Interfax - President of the Russian Association of Centers for Religious and Sectarian Studies Professor Alexander Dvorkin is concerned with Mormon activities in the Russian Federation.

"We have been informed that American Mormon missionaries were detained on the territory of secret military facilities more than once. They are accused of having CIA connections, and it is reasonable," he is quoted as saying by the Komsomolskaya Pravda daily on Thursday.

According to the professor, Mormons have commercial interest: "they actively buy fishing industry."Dvorkin called this sect "a rich transnational corporation."

"They always need people for "tithe" - a tenth part of income paid as a compulsory contribution to the sect. According to the experts, today Mormon's tithe makes one third of their income," he stated.

As Dvorkin said earlier, there are over 80 big sects active in more than half Russian regions. He thinks, minor sects numbers "in thousands."
____________
OK, just so no one is confused, LDS tithing is 1/10th of your income. I sure hope tithing in Russia is not 1/3. Compulsory even! Phew! That would be killer!

Dorf on Golf

So I arranged a BYU law society luncheon on Friday. That's not the funny part, though. I also arranged for us to have a golf scramble afterward. Me? Golf? It just makes my lips numb to think about it. You could tie golf clubs to my hands and I would be golfing. Sort of like Bill Murray:



I have absolutely zippo experience golfing (except a few lessons when I was 12). When I showed up at the course, I was like, "um, can I share clubs with you?" Share? Clubs? Apparently it's not done. So one of the guys in our group went to his car and got another set of clubs for me. Then I realized--"oh, oops, I can't use those. I'm left-handed." I guess golf clubs are not baseball bats.

So I got my own leftie clubs and we got going. Thank goodness it was a "scramble" where we play the best ball! We were there for about 4 1/2 hours, but if I hit off my own position each time I would have easily have been there for 10 hours!

Golf is really just another one of Bill Murray's movies. It felt like "Groundhog Day" on every hole. I mean, you hit the ball 50 yards or so, drive up and take a few more swipes at the ball (occasionally striking out, even though it's not baseball), and then some other guy gets it in the hole. Then, when you realize you're two over par (whatever that is), you have to start AGAIN. Hit the ball, drive the cart, swipe a few more times, someone else hits it in the hole. AGAIN. Hit, drive, swipe. AGAIN. Hit drive swipe. 18 times.

At least I was golfing with some great guys. I mean, what kind of guy has it in him to zip it while you're swinging airballs one, two, three times in a row? These guys were nice. Of course, they were standing behind me, so I have no idea what they were doing.

Anyway, it was fun but not really me. Am I ready to ditch the sport of my profession? Maybe. At least I wouldn't mind if I didn't have to play... that much. But it'll happen again. I'm a lawyer for crying out loud!

Adoption Conference

Last weekend we went to Boise to attend a conference on adoption. As most of you may know, we are anxiously awaiting to adopt a child. Jessi and I believe that adoption is one of the most marvelous blessings that a family can have in this life. We hope to be so blessed someday soon.

The Conference was wonderful. We both learned so much. It ended with a roundtable discussion with a group of women who had placed their children for adoption. We both learned quite a bit from these amazing women. I don't think I will ever understand the strength it would take to give your child to another.

While we were in Boise, we visited with Melissa and Logan and my parents. We went out to eat quite often, which can be fun but also expensive and fattening. Needless to say, we didn't go here:

I've heard of pro se litigants, but a restaurant? Ridiculous.

We stayed with our friends, Rod and Deena McArthur. They have four cute kids who loved playing with Jaydn. We really appreciated being able to stay with them!

Take me out to the...

ballgame. Against the Casper Ghosts. You think they could have thought of a more original nickname?

The Chukars killed 'em. It's all right that we're named after a dumb bird, because at least a bird has a body.

Nevermind the double chin.

We sat right behind home plate. Jaydn picked the longest corndog in history for his snack. He is a corndogaholic.

We moved closer to the Chukars bullpen a little later in the game. Since it was the library reading day, there were kids all over the place. During the game, a gaggle of kids surrounded the small space leading into the bullpen anticipating autographs. The ballboy just shooed them away each time. Then, I noticed he was looking at us and had a ball in his hand. He motioned toward Jaydn, so I told Jaydn to walk over to him. Jaydn was so excited when he got an official Pioneer league baseball from the ballboy. I guess it pays to be calm and patient, like Jaydn.

We left in the seventh inning, pretty confident that the "Ghosts" had absolutely no chance of winning. The funnest part of the night for me was seeing Jaydn have a good time.